Following His Plan

As far back as I can remember, I have had an inner confidence that no matter what happens or how things look to me, I will be ok.  God will take care of me.  So far that's been true, I don't see any reason to start doubting that now.

I was hurt, angry and couldn't understand why at the last minute Miller decided not to hire us back.  But after praying about it, I believe it's because God has other plans for me.  I can't participate if I'm always gone on the road when events are happening at home.  After the car wreck I had complete peace about going back to driving.  This time I never felt any peace about it.

Last night I was questioning whether I understood right or not.  Maybe it was just my fear because of the wreck that kept me from feeling peaceful about driving over the road again.  This morning I didn't know what to read in my Bible so I asked God to show me.  I closed my eyes and opened it at random.  I opened to Jonah chapter 1.  The message I got from that was to be obedient.  Life will be less stormy that way.  The next random passages I turned to was Matthew 6:31-34.  Don't worry about how we are going to pay bills and buy food.  When God is first in all things and we are seeking a closer walk with Him, He will take care of us.  He will do that because He loves us and He wants our focus on Him.  

The message I get is that I need to be obedient, trust Him to provide and put Him first in my life.  And be home to participate in outreach events.

It will be evident what's important by the order of our priorities.  I've found that I'm much calmer throughout the day when I pray first thing when my eyes open.  I sleep better at night when prayer is the last thing before I fall asleep.  And of course I talk to God all throughout the day. Thankful for things I have, help with struggles.  It makes a difference.

I'm taking one day at a time, and today I have everything I need.

Material World

If you ask people how they would determine if someone is successful,  most would base their decision on how big their house is, what car they drive, and other material possessions.  The "American Dream" as some would say.
I lived with an alcoholic / addict for many years.  About 4 years into this I was finally able to leave (the second time of many times).  The thing that held me back that long was that I didn't want to leave without my "stuff", my material possessions.
When I finally decided I had to leave, with or without my things, was a turning point within me.  My priorities changed.  God made a way and I was able to get my things.  Then I was given a bed and other things by the last people I would have thought.  But I had to let go first.
I learned a valuable lesson through that.  Stuff is just stuff.  Most of the stuff we own is nice to have, but when it comes down to it, food, clothing, shelter, and love are necessities.  Transportation is pretty important these days too.  Lack of transportation of my own kept me stuck for quite a while.  I was finally able to get enough money for a $100 downpayment on a $600 car.  It wasn't all that, but it ran good and was in my name.  I left, but it didn't work out with the friend I was staying with, and he talked me into coming back.  It was better for a while, then it was same song, second verse.  The next time I left, I stayed with another friend for a short time, then was able to get an apartment of my own.
I was on a merry go round with him for alot of years.  I loved him very much and had high hopes that if I stuck it out long enough, I'd have a good marriage.

Sometimes it's better to love them from a distance.